The "H" Word

This week I listened to a lecture given by James Pawelski on Positive Psychology, which is "the scientific study of the strengths that enable individuals and communities to thrive".  This lecture inspired me to do more digging around the topic of positive psychology because recently I have been asking myself those light questions like - what is my purpose?  How can I contribute more to this beautiful world we call home?

The idea of positive psychology originated from Martin Seligman who presents the theory in a very interesting TED Talk (people who know me, know that I love TED Talks and it is why I have used 50% of my download with half the month still to go!).  Dr. Seligman believes that psychology should not only focus on healing those with mental illness but also focus on us day-to-day-ers.  Accordingly, Dr. Seligman discusses that psychology should:

• Be interested in peoples' strengths as well as their weaknesses,
• Be as equally interested in developing the best things in peoples' lives as well as repairing the worst things, and
• Be able to provide tools to people to create even more fulfilling lives by nurturing their high talents.

Dr Seligman coined three "happy" lives, each one creating more lasting happiness than the one before:

1. The Pleasant Life - this is the life that relies on experiencing as much positive emotion as possible and amplifying it.  The drawbacks of this life are that it is often bestowed to you by your parents and not very flexible (I wonder if yoga would help with this?!).  It habituates i.e. the first time something great happens it is amazing, by the sixth time it occurs it's old news.
2. The Good Life - being engaged in life.  Working out what your signature strengths are and re-crafting your life to maximise their use thereby having the side effect of increasing your positive experiences at work, love and play. 
3. The Meaningful Life - knowing your highest strengths and using these in the service of something larger than yourself, being altruistic.  I'll never forget the time that an old (read ex-) friend of mine said to me "Why would you want to volunteer your time?  You don't get paid!!" 

What I love about positive psychology is that it strives to nurture a belief that humans want to lead meaningful and fulfilling lives.  And it does this by cultivating the best talent within an individual and subsequently enhancing that individual's experiences of love, work and play by maximising the use of this strength.  So how do we get to this meaningful and fulfilling life?

Let's look at the happiness formula (yes, for the maths nerds out there, there is a formula):

H = S + C + V

H = enduring happiness i.e. how you have been feeling in the last 6-9 months.

S = set range which is biologically influenced similar to our weight set point.

C = circumstances i.e. our environment - winning the lotto, becoming paraplegic.  I know, these two are pretty radical extremes but it has been shown that once the initial effects of extremely happy and extremely tragic events settle, your happiness returns to your set point.

V = volition i.e. your personal choices.  Interestingly here the question comes up - can we guide our personal choices to help make us lastingly happier?

Now how do we increase H?  There are three simple exercises that have been shown to increase your Enduring Happiness:

1. The Three Blessings exercise - before you go to bed write down three good things that happened during the day and why each of them happened.  This takes the focus off what went wrong during the day or what you didn't achieve.  The study that Dr. Seligman conducted using this exercise showed that participants' happiness increased up to 6 months after the experiment and the reason for this was they enjoyed the exercise so much they continued it!
2. The Gratitude Visit - think of someone who did something important for you whom you have not yet thanked properly.  Write down in a letter exactly what they did for you and the specific consequences that occurred in your life because of their actions.  Take care in the presentation of the letter and the content.  Meet with the person face-to-face and read them the gratitude letter (with tissues!).  Dr. Seligman demonstrated that this exercise produced a spike in happiness one week and one month after the visit but by six months the participant's happiness had returned to baseline and possibly another visit was due.
3. Find Your Signature Strengths and then use your signature strengths in new ways:
1. Work out what your signature strengths are by using the above link (you'll have to register a log in...don't sigh, just do it!  Do you want a Meaningful Life?!).
2. Think of ways you already use them.
3. Brainstorm ways you can use these strengths even more.
4. Commit to using your strengths in new ways this week.

• Dr Seligman showed with this exercise that it improved happiness a week after, a month after and six months after this was implemented into the participant's life.

My beautiful gratitude diary that I was given for Christmas from my gorgeous sister-in-law to be.

Fun vs. Philanthropy

Tying it altogether - how can we use our signature strengths to create lasting happiness?  Well let's conduct an experiment: 

• In the next week do something fun for fun's sake and then do something philanthropic that has special meaning for you.  
• As you engage in these activities note how they each make you feel - you may find that although the fun is fun, the emotion wears off; the philanthropic activity however, tends to have a lasting positive effect on your happiness.

Report in after you have done your experiment - how did both activities make you feel?  Are you more likely to repeat the philanthropic activity?  Has this helped you to find your own special and unique Meaningful Life?